Johnny is a Bishop, Heretic, Prophet, Priest, Apostle and ASM (Ascended Spiritual Master). On his good days he is often also the one true almighty God incarnate. He enjoys writing theology and philosophy articles and spreading the Gospel promise of Universal Salvation
I will fight for you Because you are my friend If anyone tries to hurt you I’ll be there to defend
It sickens me to see how sad you are Come into my world, be brave, don’t fret. They defame you while we watch from afar But I’ll stand up for you, never forget.
Why did I bother?
I will not fight you I value you more than that
Why do you fight me I thought you were a friend After all my trust and loyalty Is this how it’s going to end?
It sickens me to hear how happy you are You show no signs of guilt or regret and defame me while I watch from afar So am I a friend, or did you forget?
Or maybe you never cared anyway
get out of my life get out of my life get out of my life get out of my head I want you dead.
Johnny is a Bishop, Heretic, Prophet, Priest, Apostle and ASM (Ascended Spiritual Master). On his good days he is often also the one true almighty God incarnate. He enjoys writing theology and philosophy articles and spreading the Gospel promise of Universal Salvation
“What do you think I should do with you?” I sigh. Not this shit again. The unanswerable question. Haven’t teachers learned by now that asking the criminal student what their punishment is going to be only results in blank stares and a mumbling of “Umm..I dunno”? I mean, how the hell do you answer a question like that? “Well sir I think it would be most excellent if you give me a piggy back and buy me my lunch today” or “Oh please give me a good spanking sir! I’ve been a very naughty boy”. Even a hearty response of “Aye my lord!” would be as good an answer as any to this ridiculous question. But do you know the funny thing? Every time the request for my most valuable opinion on this matter has been thrown at me, I’ve always managed to somehow produce the correct answer. It doesn’t matter what I’ve done; whether I’ve just murdered a classmate with a lead pencil for stealing my ruler (The bastard deserved it), I’ve burnt down the science block because science is the worst subject in the world (Who the heck designed that syllabus?!) or I’ve just stolen the bank account details of every teacher in the school: I always manage to smooth talk out of trouble. Hell… It must go with the name. A-Lex: “Above the law”. Just give me time to make a considered response and I’ll have the words they want to hear, presented in Iambic pentameter with a British accent to boot. But don’t let that fool you into thinking I’m ‘lying’, oh no I could never do that. Everything I say is completely truthful and sincere. It has to be! And so here I am; faced with the impossible question again. One multiple choice answer away from a million and one dollars. What did I do this time? Well let me put it this way: This is what happens when the clockwork orange doesn’t drink his milk.
I was born with a brain to rule the world, whether by anarchy or monarchy is irrelevant; all you need is something to think about and a good dosage of ADHD to keep you from thinking about it. I grew up free of added substances, and oh what a stroppy young lad I was! Centre of the universe, as all children tend to be, and ready to fight to maintain the position. Ironically I was filled with modesty and far from spoilt, it’s kind of the case when you come from a loving, yet quite dysfunctional family. Nevertheless, from a young age I had the criminal tendencies and loved them. My teachers and carers didn’t. I found myself in trouble every second day, but managed to hang on; the fire of my wrongdoings growing ever higher. Eventually the flames flew out of control; the straw that broke the camels back; I had performed the perfect lead pencil poisoning. We were sitting there in the library, cutting and pasting, or some other tedious task designed to keep a collection of five year old kids occupied, and my ruler had gone missing. I was filled with rage, someone must have stolen it! Lo and behold, there it was, in the hands of my best friend. I drew my lead pencil, immediately confronting him and demanding to know why he was holding my ruler. “This is my ruler…?” That was as good as an admission of guilt for me. I wore the best mask of rage a child of that age could ask for, and plunged my pencil deep into his chest. His failure to breathe registered in my mind as the sign of victory and I pressed the pencil in harder, grinning sadistically as all that beautiful blood gushed from the wound. The other children screamed and ran for the Librarian, the fools, my friend wasn’t complaining; I hadn’t heard a word of protest from him. Foam, phlegm and other disgusting bile of the inner body was bubbling at his throat and coating his lips, which had begun to turn blue. I didn’t recognise the signs of imminent death, if I had I would have been as horrified as the rest of my class mates; and so in ignorance I assumed I was merely providing an eye for an eye, a pencil for a ruler, and enjoyed it as much as possible. The librarian finally parted us, and everything that occurred next happened in such a whirlwind that to describe it in this linear fashion would not do it justice. I had killed him. To this day he still has to wear nappies to compensate for the damage I did, and to be honest, when you’re wearing pants like that, that’s as good as death to me.
It had taken them a while, but they had realised something was seriously wrong with me. And so, to the best and most expensive doctor I had to go. “He doesn’t really seem to belong” “I don’t WANT to belong” “You don’t want to belong? aww, that’s too bad, because you see… You ‘need’ to belong. If you don’t want to belong, we’re going to make you. We’re going to make you a good boy.” Drugs, prescription or otherwise, ruin life. I was administered cocaine with a brand name, and that ruined my life by fixing it. So this is what it feels like to belong huh? Not half bad… 103% on every test, teachers falling over themselves to have me in their class, give me merit awards, call me the model student. Super concentration ability, incubated natural intelligence to the point of genius. Sounds good. Lack of sleep, the inability to talk to someone’s face, headaches, the loss of my sense of taste. Sounds good? Changing school six times, losing sight of what it means to have a best friend, losing the creative side of my brain to logical, mathematical, computerised thought processes. This is what it means to belong? Alright. What a Dreary world… I rebelled in much the same manner as I always had, but in much more controlled doses, and always escaping punishment.
Nine years on, and I’d lost my emotions. If this is what it means to belong, I still want nothing to do with it! Why do they keep telling us all that drugs are bad, while feeding them to me as if the whole country depends on it, and then I only end up like this anyway. Hypocrisy on every level! My dosage had doubled, tripled and doubled again, and I had had enough.
I didn’t drink my milk. And here I am; facing the consequences. It seems rather sad to me, that I truly do need to belong in order to survive in this world. Belonging is annoying, but it’s something that has to be endured. The world doesn’t need another terrorist, murderer, rapist. The world needs a good leader, not a criminal. I know this and understand it. Hate it and accept it.
But it doesn’t stop me enjoying myself every now and then. The door of the Principals’ office clicks loudly, locking the outside world away. The one sir to rule them all slowly moves back towards his desk, his shoes thudding loudly and echoing off the walls with every step. He sits down at the extraneously large table, rests his arms upon it, crosses his fingers together and glares at me over his glasses. I smile and stare right back. “I don’t know sir; What do you think I… should do with you?”
Johnny is a Bishop, Heretic, Prophet, Priest, Apostle and ASM (Ascended Spiritual Master). On his good days he is often also the one true almighty God incarnate. He enjoys writing theology and philosophy articles and spreading the Gospel promise of Universal Salvation
I hate maths it turns mind into brain Intelligent thought lost like tears in the rain Equations functions, graphs I’ve had enough, If this is all there is to life then I give up. I was not born for a life that means I need to crunch numbers like machines I spy a paradox! How about you? How can a machine be alive too? And that is exactly how I feel With every equation I become less real.
Every X, every Y, I feel my heart flutter, Oh god, who would have guessed? Death by Algebra! Every point plotted produces pain I must hide Every new question kills me from inside Every new topic I die a little more The amount of horror makes up for the gore
Maths is stupid maths is lame Maths is death by another name In maths death is a game, Just a statistic to take the blame.
Johnny is a Bishop, Heretic, Prophet, Priest, Apostle and ASM (Ascended Spiritual Master). On his good days he is often also the one true almighty God incarnate. He enjoys writing theology and philosophy articles and spreading the Gospel promise of Universal Salvation
Johnny is a Bishop, Heretic, Prophet, Priest, Apostle and ASM (Ascended Spiritual Master). On his good days he is often also the one true almighty God incarnate. He enjoys writing theology and philosophy articles and spreading the Gospel promise of Universal Salvation
We were Sitting down at lunch one day, Me and Ba, and Scott and Ray, Being Happy and merry (But never gay) Until Shank decided to come our way.
The conversation quickly turns, To that which makes the stomach churn; Hot chicks, porno, renticle tape To make shank stop it, we give him a shake.
“Profanities Shank” loudly proclaims Ba, “Give it a rest” I say, “You’ve gone too far” “bIsAmused equals false” guffaws semlar, And Ray just pretends to play a guitar.
Ba scratches his head and thinks of a topic, one that is safe and will make shank stop it. Up until then, everything was normal… “So who are you guys taking to the formal?”
This quickly got everyone’s attention, I stayed quiet, as if on detention. I was interested but it did not show, Everyone became edgy, ready to blow.
Semlar coughed “Sarah”, we whacked him hard, “She’s in France, are you a retard?” Ba says that he wants to ask Alanna This gets met with “Ba’s gonna be a father!”
Ba hides his face and talks to shank What did they say? I drew a blank. I became apprehensive as of then “Who did you say you are asking again?”
His one word answer, as it sunk into my mind Sent my heart crazy and put shivers down my spine The one name that I did not want to hear “Nicole” said shank, confirming my worst fear.
She was the only girl that I wanted to take And now she’s about to be stolen by Shank. The gears in my head started to revolve A plan was formed and I was resolved.
Shank will NOT be stealing my redhead; He will be taking someone else instead. This occupied me for the rest of the day Shank had become my enemy in a way.
As I looked at my options I exclaimed “damn” I didn’t know whether it would go to plan But I was possesed and my fingers would shake In such a frenzy I made a fatal mistake
One email that I don’t want to recall I was putting too much faith in it all. With butterflies in stomach, excitement, nervous, I pushed “send” and the words did their service
I had no idea that I was already dead, So I felt better then ever as I climbed into bed. I had to make certain that shank didn’t ask, His real words are superior to an email from my arse.
The next day was friday, both a blessing and a curse. After school was youth group at Ba’s Christian church. This meant I could ask her for real Shank could too; so it was not ideal
I had a sense of “Carpe Diem”, Sieze the day! On top of the world? I was feeling this way. But behind it all there was a sense of betrayal: No matter what, one of us is going to fail.
For the first time I could see what paths lay before me Extreme jealousy or sweet victory, which was it to be? I was determined to see this through “Damn you Shank, this is all because of you!”
And so there we we’re on friday night Soccer in the park; it was a vicious fight. Does shank suspect why I am here? If he does then I must fear:
If Shank Knows my thoughts then he’ll be using all speed He will pounce on Nicole like one full of greed. But if he doesn’t know my plan he will take his time, Wondering how to word himself, while I make a beeline.
Either way the race is on, for I will not be waiting long. Besides I’m wearing sneakers, I can’t lose to his thongs. For Nicole I begin to search around, I covered quite a lot of ground.
But what is this? I can not find, the thing that has plagued my mind. Where on earth could Nicole be? Surely she can’t be hiding from me.
The night dragged on and it became clear: Nicole was not going to be coming here. I was disappointed until I saw the truth More time to practice not sounding like a goof.
I withdrew from my thoughts and looked around There was Ba and at Shank he frowned. Shank had no idea that he was spoiling Ba’s chance For Ba to man up and ask Alanna to this dance.
I laughed and let the night take me away The stress was gone until another day. And so I had a lot of fun Before I knew it, the night was done.
I woke up and it was saturday I felt good but the sky was grey This was a bad omen that I ignored I had slept so well! I never even yawned
I turn on the computer, I let it load I waited and waited until the windows logo showed. I decided to check email but I had totally forgot, That email of doom that I should have let rot.
I had new messages but none from Nicole But I didn’t worry. Today won’t be droll. So I let the morning go flying away, Before I knew it, it was the end of the day.
Once again I returned to my email To find a reply from a certain female. And there it was waiting for me; The reply of success, surely.
My heart was beating, I didn’t dare To read that which was written there. My hand hesitated for I could not bare, A reply that causes me to tear out my hair.
But then I decide to take the plunge This sweat making me as wet as a sponge. I opened the email that decided fate No more delay. I could not wait.
“I’m sorry, but I can’t go” This can not be! No no NO! “I’m sorry, but I can’t go…with you” No…After what I’ve been through…
The world had ended, Shank had won I had failed, the game was done. Silent tears flowed as I retreated to bed Sadness was swept up into dreams instead
I woke up feeling depressed the next day I couldn’t believe that it had happened this way. But I would not go down like this, I must stop Shank, make him miss.
I come to school, Shank says “Wassup!” “What a bummer that she didn’t turn up!” At recess I find Ba talking to Shank The subject, “Revenge” and some stuff about tanks.
Ba says that the Bible condones vengence “How ironic, that means I won’t pay repentance” “Only if the punishment fits the crime” “Perfect. You know, that sounds just fine”
So I vowed to stay close to Shank, never give him a chance To ask Nicole to the formal, they would never dance. To me it seemed an eye for an eye I couldn’t forsee how this plan died
And so it was Friday night once more. We were in a church with leaky walls. This time Nicole did indeed show What Shank was thinking we could only know.
An awkward triangle we three made In a river of emotion I did wade While Shank stood silent trying to think And eventually, Nicole ran off to get a drink.
Shank stayed away from her for most of the night I relaxed and watched some bogans fight. The next thing I know Shank has disappeared But before I could swear I saw what I feared.
Shank had a look of confidence on his face As he turned round the corner I was frozen in place But what came next was not expected Shank looked strangely affected
He rounded the corner looking resolved but as he came back the look had dissolved From within came an exclamation of glee: “She didn’t pick him and she didn’t pick me!”
To me it came as a great victory Shank tried to take it happily His poker face hid what emotion he felt He eyed me off till my face almost melt.
He was thinking the same as me “My ranga was stolen by Herlihy” I laughed and told him of my fail He seemed to be turning pale.
My thoughts turned inward, as they do And I got thinking about things undue This was not a victory at all, Oh boy did I just drop the ball
Revenge is a dish best served cold. That’s what I have always been told. So of course it came as no suprise When all of a sudden, I realised:
Nicole would not be at our formal With me or Shank or someone normal. I couldn’t help feeling that it was all my fault I should have locked my hard feelings in a vault
I was blind. Look what I’ve done. Oh sad consequences of my fun. As I dealt with reality It finally sunk into me
This formal is more trouble then it’s worth Time to get more down to earth. And so I chose to forget these incidents I did not want to remember, the memory was rinsed
And so I forgot, I could not recall Until another email brought me back to it all. Ba gives the facts as blunt as a plank “Nicole wanted to say yes to Shank.”
Ba haven’t you heard that ignorance is bliss? Why oh why did you have to tell me this? I demand that you now let me know From where this information flows
But Ba is silent, he does not say Why these tidings came my way So I leave the mystery unsolved And once again the memories dissolved
The formal it did come and go And I did not toss to and fro I just came and had some fun Before I knew it, the night was done.
On the bus I sat with Shank We talked of all things rank Hot chicks, porno, renticle tape But I didn’t stop it, It was too late.
Shank was not an enemy then “I still wish you asked Nicole again, Even though we had such fun, I still wish that she had come”
I hear a sigh, he gathers breath I’m so tired I feel like death “We’re still learners” is the last thing he said But I still wish that I had my redhead.
I haven’t seen Shank since then, And I have taken to the pen “We’re still learners” lingers in sight With that in mind I kiss the Formal good night
I finally can let it go No more of this horrible show Months have passed since I last cried. To the formal, a big “Good bye!”
But no, I had a dream last night You see, it gave me quite a fright Not because it was a nightmare But for what was contained in there:
The formal again, I’m back on the boat With Ba, Alanna and a red goat. But there is one I was not expecting to see Nicole! And she is coming towards me.
But before I can say “This must be a dream” There appears Shank, his smile like a beam. Hands clasped firmly with Nicoles, I was enraged at the sight Such a fury that I woke myself up in the middle of the night.
I do not know what this dream meant But one thing I know as hard as cement: This formal will not close it’s door It will plague my mind forever more.
Johnny is a Bishop, Heretic, Prophet, Priest, Apostle and ASM (Ascended Spiritual Master). On his good days he is often also the one true almighty God incarnate. He enjoys writing theology and philosophy articles and spreading the Gospel promise of Universal Salvation
We found ourselves among the magenta lights, Swimming in the ocean of fireflies, Dancing in the galaxy of vibrating embers.
A certain kind of bliss. But not the blessed happiness.
I saw you sitting before me, sipping an ice cold rivet, slightly nodding your head as the band before us exploded with sound. You were absolutely gorgeous. I couldn’t avert my eyes for more than a few seconds before I was drawn back again to gaze upon your beautiful face and figure. My masculine hesitation prevented me from saying anything, or perhaps it was simply the catastrophic chaos of the mosh and the violence and volume of the drums. I suppressed my subtle longing to reach out and connect.
And then the gig was over.
I turned and talked with my new friend and flatmate, another lovely lady joining us in the conversation. Eventually they ran off, and I was alone.
And then you returned, met me in the doorway, and said hello. What on earth is happening? The most beautiful girl at the party, confidently walking up and introducing herself to me?
My head was reeling, as the empathic amphetamines were beginning to overwhelm me. It was easy to talk, and yet hard to converse. I felt elevated, and yet unable to follow a train of thought to conclusion. Nevertheless, we laughed, and we spoke, and we connected.
Danielle was your name, and Alex mine; You study psychology, I study scripture; You work on the street, I spin code on a screen; You are drinking beer, I am drinking water; Your heritage is chinese malaysian, mine is the british isles; And both of us are true blue Aussies.
You ask why I’m drinking water. I respond that I’m being very cautious tonight. You immediately know what’s going on: you fully understand the nuances of the scene: Magnesium, Vitamin C, Alpha Lipoic Acid, 5-HTP. I laugh and shake my head: “She knows!”
So I am here to find God in myself and God in the other, and experience the joy and bliss of connection. Why are you here?
“This is my fourth beer in half an hour” Laughing, I reel back in surprise. “And I’ve dropped a cap too” Smiling, I shake my head in shock. What on earth are you running from?
But I don’t have the chance to ask, for the party whisks you away to the next conversation.
The night goes on and the love flows round. People are dancing, people are stumbling, people are pinging, people are munting. Everyone is laughing, everyone is having fun. The beat never changes for the entire night, but the crowd remains content. And the whole time, I wonder, what are you running from?
I meet many people, all of them lost souls, finding consolation in the ephemerality of life. Some lay beneath the blossom tree, gazing up at the flowers. Watching them float away and die. Some take refuge in the absurdity of nihilism, and angrily proclaim the pointlessness of life. No one here experiences salvation. No one here understands the gospel. No one here understands the power of Christ. How sad. How bittersweet.
Where are the elect in this place? Where are the ones who walk in the light? Perhaps this is my mission field.
A night concluded in the blink of an eye. I’m back home, lying in bed. Thinking back to the people and the party, And especially you, that most gorgeous girl.
What were you running from? I may never know. But then again, I plan to return once more. I plan to carry the light of Christ into that dark place; To shine and illuminate; To preach and proclaim; To save this abandoned nihilistic hedonistic mass.
I don’t know what you were running from, but I know what you are searching for: You are searching for the love that never dies; The bliss that always endures; The divinity that satisfies all longing; The salvific rest of the Savior; The warm embrace of Christ.
You don’t believe it’s possible, but I know it’s true, and I will embrace this descent into Hell to convince you of it. I will not abandon you to the illusionary pleasures, but introduce you to the source of all life and love.
What were you running from? I don’t know, but whatever it was, I want you to know: there IS meaning in life. Take my hand and i will show you; Follow me and I will give you rest.
God beckons, and he is waiting to wrap you up in an eternal embrace of ecstatic bliss, so let us ascend to heaven and enjoy the divine feast that has been prepared for us. There is a seat at the table of the lord with your name on it, and I will not rest until you have taken your place at the supper of the lamb.
Whatever you may be running from, run to God, And you will experience the ecstasy beyond ecstasy, The life beyond life, And the love beyond all love.
Run to God, and you will become one with the infinite beauty; United to the hidden aesthetic truth, Forever soaring beyond the sun and the myriad stars.
Johnny is a Bishop, Heretic, Prophet, Priest, Apostle and ASM (Ascended Spiritual Master). On his good days he is often also the one true almighty God incarnate. He enjoys writing theology and philosophy articles and spreading the Gospel promise of Universal Salvation
Johnny is a Bishop, Heretic, Prophet, Priest, Apostle and ASM (Ascended Spiritual Master). On his good days he is often also the one true almighty God incarnate. He enjoys writing theology and philosophy articles and spreading the Gospel promise of Universal Salvation
Johnny is a Bishop, Heretic, Prophet, Priest, Apostle and ASM (Ascended Spiritual Master). On his good days he is often also the one true almighty God incarnate. He enjoys writing theology and philosophy articles and spreading the Gospel promise of Universal Salvation
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You do… do you?
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I will fight for you![Clockwork-Orange-34[1].jpg](https://antipodeanosmosis.files.wordpress.com/2019/03/clockwork-orange-341.jpg?resize=676%2C282)
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We were Sitting down at lunch one day,![1c70b053e5235ed30d1d567103b62807[1].jpg](https://antipodeanosmosis.files.wordpress.com/2018/09/1c70b053e5235ed30d1d567103b628071.jpg?resize=289%2C289)
We found ourselves among the magenta lights,