I step out the door into the frost Walk once more to the fountain of loss. Memories haunt every corner on the way Hiding in these trees that the wind would sway
Against the grey clouds and white sky I can’t help but let my imagination sigh. I’m walking through an Autumn tunnel And standing in a wet winter puddle
To the left is my third school Desolation brings a breeze cold; not cool. The grounds; abandoned. The gates; locked. But my memories would have this scene mocked
I see children, wearing the blue of the day Laughing and running their childhood away A rather stark contrast to this black I wear now I still smile to see a uniform as I glance down
I’m at a cross in the road covered by leaves On the right is a place for someone who believes To my left leads another tunnel of trees But the evergreen conceals darker memories;
An image of friendship confronts my eyes Friendship caught in a walking web of lies It disappears into the darkness and distance Leaving behind loyalty, trust and innocence.
I bend to pick up these pieces of past Why is it that these virtues never last? Why did friendship have to walk behind Lust embracing a love of my mind?
I drop the naive back on the pavement Ignorance shatters and secures my only repayment I’m walking on without looking behind For if I did… I wonder what I would find.
I lived in that house. I know this road. Still the same lawn; ever un-mowed. There’s the park where I used to fly On swings so high you could touch the sky.
I look to the other side of the street To see three who “by coincidence” did meet Smiles, laughter and completely alive I blink and let the image die
Onwards, to the fountain, I’m almost there This is the big one for which I prepared. A circle of significance, clock of no time This hunk of metal hides meaning behind grime
The image is so strong this time around That my whole body lifts itself off the ground And I find myself walking through twilight rain To the overflowing fountain from a train.
The path is deserted; Everyone has found cover Alone I am walking, but wait, there’s another A beautiful girl radiating red sunshine Confronted with her, the weather seems fine
She smiles, walking towards me with arms extended I walk towards her feeling as if time had just ended We fall into each other and on the spot embrace While the freezing rain falls; soaking her smiling face
But we don’t mind. Just stand still, holding on Once over this moment will be forever gone I close my eyes and enter a void of bliss The world’s best kiss doesn’t compare with this
I can feel a cold wind licking my cheek The amazing feeling begins to grow weak. I wake up to find the sky still grey Still that same dreary winters-mid-day
Memories can bend a chain but not break one To break a chain requires something more of a gun. With that in mind I turn, walk and climb Find the glass bridge and recall a crime.
Lust’s lying spider smiles as he holds close a close friend I wish to ignore what I saw, but can’t even pretend. She stood still while with most gentle caress The damned deadly Demon her beautiful body did undress.
I’m watching my memory be murdered once more The past includes images that strike at my core. Trust turned to lust while loyalty and love were just lies; Nothing of this nostalgia retains purity to my eyes.
Time to learn, turn and leave this place Walk back, wipe the rain from my face Back through Hornsby, Normanhurst and Wahroonga; Through the lies and lost love. What cold nostalgia.
Johnny is a Bishop, Heretic, Prophet, Priest, Apostle and ASM (Ascended Spiritual Master). On his good days he is often also the one true almighty God incarnate. He enjoys writing theology and philosophy articles and spreading the Gospel promise of Universal Salvation
I sublimate all that I hear, smell and feel. Savour that taste which I see is not real, Believe that by this, it all comes together As Identity for now and forever. The choices I make, the best I can be, Both to myself and society, Life, the universe and all are the same, For I have met God, and absurd is his name.
And now my head is spinning round; I fly up only to come plummeting down. For the final Zenith of Absurdity Is only a proud ode to Insanity. As I fall under the gaze of eternity I look back, and there’s nothing to see Where is the truth? The Light? The life? I’m cornered by sin, surrounded by strife
To dive down into deepest despair Nothing makes sense, I’m gasping for air Pulled down by my pride
A bible story A man in the desert, Tempted by Satan What does it mean?
Johnny is a Bishop, Heretic, Prophet, Priest, Apostle and ASM (Ascended Spiritual Master). On his good days he is often also the one true almighty God incarnate. He enjoys writing theology and philosophy articles and spreading the Gospel promise of Universal Salvation
Did you dream about me? That’s all I am to most people now. No address. No phone. No facebook. Dimly remembered. I recognise people from long long ago everyday and when they see me It is strange strained stares that I draw. Stares that say “Who are you?” “How do I know you?” “Why do I recognise you?”
I am dark nostalgia Someone who sat before you and shared your torture, Someone who knows how to speak your language, Someone who remembers where you live, the bus you caught, the school you attended Yet you still can’t quite place that presence of the past in the present.
And yet my face draws dazed recollections into your eyes Your gaze swiftly averted Fluttered heart breaking You don’t remember me The only explanation You never knew me The final answer Did you dream… One last hope – About me?
Johnny is a Bishop, Heretic, Prophet, Priest, Apostle and ASM (Ascended Spiritual Master). On his good days he is often also the one true almighty God incarnate. He enjoys writing theology and philosophy articles and spreading the Gospel promise of Universal Salvation
“What do you think I should do with you?” I sigh. Not this shit again. The unanswerable question. Haven’t teachers learned by now that asking the criminal student what their punishment is going to be only results in blank stares and a mumbling of “Umm..I dunno”? I mean, how the hell do you answer a question like that? “Well sir I think it would be most excellent if you give me a piggy back and buy me my lunch today” or “Oh please give me a good spanking sir! I’ve been a very naughty boy”. Even a hearty response of “Aye my lord!” would be as good an answer as any to this ridiculous question. But do you know the funny thing? Every time the request for my most valuable opinion on this matter has been thrown at me, I’ve always managed to somehow produce the correct answer. It doesn’t matter what I’ve done; whether I’ve just murdered a classmate with a lead pencil for stealing my ruler (The bastard deserved it), I’ve burnt down the science block because science is the worst subject in the world (Who the heck designed that syllabus?!) or I’ve just stolen the bank account details of every teacher in the school: I always manage to smooth talk out of trouble. Hell… It must go with the name. A-Lex: “Above the law”. Just give me time to make a considered response and I’ll have the words they want to hear, presented in Iambic pentameter with a British accent to boot. But don’t let that fool you into thinking I’m ‘lying’, oh no I could never do that. Everything I say is completely truthful and sincere. It has to be! And so here I am; faced with the impossible question again. One multiple choice answer away from a million and one dollars. What did I do this time? Well let me put it this way: This is what happens when the clockwork orange doesn’t drink his milk.
I was born with a brain to rule the world, whether by anarchy or monarchy is irrelevant; all you need is something to think about and a good dosage of ADHD to keep you from thinking about it. I grew up free of added substances, and oh what a stroppy young lad I was! Centre of the universe, as all children tend to be, and ready to fight to maintain the position. Ironically I was filled with modesty and far from spoilt, it’s kind of the case when you come from a loving, yet quite dysfunctional family. Nevertheless, from a young age I had the criminal tendencies and loved them. My teachers and carers didn’t. I found myself in trouble every second day, but managed to hang on; the fire of my wrongdoings growing ever higher. Eventually the flames flew out of control; the straw that broke the camels back; I had performed the perfect lead pencil poisoning. We were sitting there in the library, cutting and pasting, or some other tedious task designed to keep a collection of five year old kids occupied, and my ruler had gone missing. I was filled with rage, someone must have stolen it! Lo and behold, there it was, in the hands of my best friend. I drew my lead pencil, immediately confronting him and demanding to know why he was holding my ruler. “This is my ruler…?” That was as good as an admission of guilt for me. I wore the best mask of rage a child of that age could ask for, and plunged my pencil deep into his chest. His failure to breathe registered in my mind as the sign of victory and I pressed the pencil in harder, grinning sadistically as all that beautiful blood gushed from the wound. The other children screamed and ran for the Librarian, the fools, my friend wasn’t complaining; I hadn’t heard a word of protest from him. Foam, phlegm and other disgusting bile of the inner body was bubbling at his throat and coating his lips, which had begun to turn blue. I didn’t recognise the signs of imminent death, if I had I would have been as horrified as the rest of my class mates; and so in ignorance I assumed I was merely providing an eye for an eye, a pencil for a ruler, and enjoyed it as much as possible. The librarian finally parted us, and everything that occurred next happened in such a whirlwind that to describe it in this linear fashion would not do it justice. I had killed him. To this day he still has to wear nappies to compensate for the damage I did, and to be honest, when you’re wearing pants like that, that’s as good as death to me.
It had taken them a while, but they had realised something was seriously wrong with me. And so, to the best and most expensive doctor I had to go. “He doesn’t really seem to belong” “I don’t WANT to belong” “You don’t want to belong? aww, that’s too bad, because you see… You ‘need’ to belong. If you don’t want to belong, we’re going to make you. We’re going to make you a good boy.” Drugs, prescription or otherwise, ruin life. I was administered cocaine with a brand name, and that ruined my life by fixing it. So this is what it feels like to belong huh? Not half bad… 103% on every test, teachers falling over themselves to have me in their class, give me merit awards, call me the model student. Super concentration ability, incubated natural intelligence to the point of genius. Sounds good. Lack of sleep, the inability to talk to someone’s face, headaches, the loss of my sense of taste. Sounds good? Changing school six times, losing sight of what it means to have a best friend, losing the creative side of my brain to logical, mathematical, computerised thought processes. This is what it means to belong? Alright. What a Dreary world… I rebelled in much the same manner as I always had, but in much more controlled doses, and always escaping punishment.
Nine years on, and I’d lost my emotions. If this is what it means to belong, I still want nothing to do with it! Why do they keep telling us all that drugs are bad, while feeding them to me as if the whole country depends on it, and then I only end up like this anyway. Hypocrisy on every level! My dosage had doubled, tripled and doubled again, and I had had enough.
I didn’t drink my milk. And here I am; facing the consequences. It seems rather sad to me, that I truly do need to belong in order to survive in this world. Belonging is annoying, but it’s something that has to be endured. The world doesn’t need another terrorist, murderer, rapist. The world needs a good leader, not a criminal. I know this and understand it. Hate it and accept it.
But it doesn’t stop me enjoying myself every now and then. The door of the Principals’ office clicks loudly, locking the outside world away. The one sir to rule them all slowly moves back towards his desk, his shoes thudding loudly and echoing off the walls with every step. He sits down at the extraneously large table, rests his arms upon it, crosses his fingers together and glares at me over his glasses. I smile and stare right back. “I don’t know sir; What do you think I… should do with you?”
Johnny is a Bishop, Heretic, Prophet, Priest, Apostle and ASM (Ascended Spiritual Master). On his good days he is often also the one true almighty God incarnate. He enjoys writing theology and philosophy articles and spreading the Gospel promise of Universal Salvation
We were standing there one winters day Me and Ba and Shank and Ray “The seats are wet”, “I know hey” Oh look there’s Scott, “His hair is so gay”
There was a time where I would have defended Raised up my arms and cried most offended Scott is a friend “Hey stop it you guys” “Give it up with the slander and lies”
But no not today oh no no no way Scott is the reason the sky is so grey. I look left to déjà vu this dreary day; For fate I have a debt to repay.
Ironic, how he’s no longer my friend There’s no doubt how this is going to end. Should I try to correct the fault? Let my hard feelings out of that vault?
Yet I can no longer trust Scott, so I refuse. Andrew Semler has been naught but bad news. He has hit my moral event horizon on the side which sends our friendship long gone
He’s made the mistake you don’t make twice The kind of promise I won’t take thrice He’s entered the game and stolen the dice My poker face now is a cold mask of ice.
He knows I’ve played this game before And I’ll not lose again; this time it’s war! I have confidence either way for once Security in my success against this dunce
I’m married. I simply can’t lose My loving wife will join me on the cruise So I’m not competing for a partner Not searching for a happily ever after.
All I want is to ruin Scott’s dreams And do it all with my smile like a beam. Yes I’m a bastard, a horrible fiend I will no longer tolerate Scott on the scene
I write it all with a touch of guilt But that’s good, it’s how I’m built There will be no regret by the time I am done Only plenty of guilt with which to have fun
Already the emails have found themselves sent The third vertex already finds herself bent It seems like an early success But I am not so easy to impress
My power on the internet has only grown stronger My stalking resumé grows longer and longer I can see all that has exchanged between My favourite nerd and my Redheaded Queen
At the slightest hint of love and wonder I will ruthlessly tear their hearts asunder And it’s none of this from Jealousy, yet. It’s the nerve of this shadow in every respect
I’ve fought against him for a whole year It’s time for the right words to enter his ear. This happens to be the most fitting way To get across what I’ve wanted to say:
You are not you; you are stubbornly me And I’m sorry to destroy your heart, honestly But if it takes such murder to make you see Then I have no regrets; Let it be.
Johnny is a Bishop, Heretic, Prophet, Priest, Apostle and ASM (Ascended Spiritual Master). On his good days he is often also the one true almighty God incarnate. He enjoys writing theology and philosophy articles and spreading the Gospel promise of Universal Salvation
Johnny is a Bishop, Heretic, Prophet, Priest, Apostle and ASM (Ascended Spiritual Master). On his good days he is often also the one true almighty God incarnate. He enjoys writing theology and philosophy articles and spreading the Gospel promise of Universal Salvation
Try all you want to provide consolation. It won’t do any good, for the only comfort I need Is that this is what it means to be human. To experience the full emotional spectrum, This is what it is to be alive
Try to provide consolation and kill me. The words of wisdom I ignore; they specify suicide. The only comfort I need, is that I am human. This is what it means to be alive Kill me? Brush away the grief? Repress my creativity? Suppress my humanity? Replace the power, strength, life of an emotion With the weak, silent, death of acceptance? Kill my emotions and kill me! Kill me when I am most alive! Embrace the anger! Give in to the grief! And right as they smile to evil victory, I turn around, and take control; Anger embraces me, grief gives in to me, and I make them work. Work words.
Johnny is a Bishop, Heretic, Prophet, Priest, Apostle and ASM (Ascended Spiritual Master). On his good days he is often also the one true almighty God incarnate. He enjoys writing theology and philosophy articles and spreading the Gospel promise of Universal Salvation
We were Sitting down at lunch one day, Me and Ba, and Scott and Ray, Being Happy and merry (But never gay) Until Shank decided to come our way.
The conversation quickly turns, To that which makes the stomach churn; Hot chicks, porno, renticle tape To make shank stop it, we give him a shake.
“Profanities Shank” loudly proclaims Ba, “Give it a rest” I say, “You’ve gone too far” “bIsAmused equals false” guffaws semlar, And Ray just pretends to play a guitar.
Ba scratches his head and thinks of a topic, one that is safe and will make shank stop it. Up until then, everything was normal… “So who are you guys taking to the formal?”
This quickly got everyone’s attention, I stayed quiet, as if on detention. I was interested but it did not show, Everyone became edgy, ready to blow.
Semlar coughed “Sarah”, we whacked him hard, “She’s in France, are you a retard?” Ba says that he wants to ask Alanna This gets met with “Ba’s gonna be a father!”
Ba hides his face and talks to shank What did they say? I drew a blank. I became apprehensive as of then “Who did you say you are asking again?”
His one word answer, as it sunk into my mind Sent my heart crazy and put shivers down my spine The one name that I did not want to hear “Nicole” said shank, confirming my worst fear.
She was the only girl that I wanted to take And now she’s about to be stolen by Shank. The gears in my head started to revolve A plan was formed and I was resolved.
Shank will NOT be stealing my redhead; He will be taking someone else instead. This occupied me for the rest of the day Shank had become my enemy in a way.
As I looked at my options I exclaimed “damn” I didn’t know whether it would go to plan But I was possesed and my fingers would shake In such a frenzy I made a fatal mistake
One email that I don’t want to recall I was putting too much faith in it all. With butterflies in stomach, excitement, nervous, I pushed “send” and the words did their service
I had no idea that I was already dead, So I felt better then ever as I climbed into bed. I had to make certain that shank didn’t ask, His real words are superior to an email from my arse.
The next day was friday, both a blessing and a curse. After school was youth group at Ba’s Christian church. This meant I could ask her for real Shank could too; so it was not ideal
I had a sense of “Carpe Diem”, Sieze the day! On top of the world? I was feeling this way. But behind it all there was a sense of betrayal: No matter what, one of us is going to fail.
For the first time I could see what paths lay before me Extreme jealousy or sweet victory, which was it to be? I was determined to see this through “Damn you Shank, this is all because of you!”
And so there we we’re on friday night Soccer in the park; it was a vicious fight. Does shank suspect why I am here? If he does then I must fear:
If Shank Knows my thoughts then he’ll be using all speed He will pounce on Nicole like one full of greed. But if he doesn’t know my plan he will take his time, Wondering how to word himself, while I make a beeline.
Either way the race is on, for I will not be waiting long. Besides I’m wearing sneakers, I can’t lose to his thongs. For Nicole I begin to search around, I covered quite a lot of ground.
But what is this? I can not find, the thing that has plagued my mind. Where on earth could Nicole be? Surely she can’t be hiding from me.
The night dragged on and it became clear: Nicole was not going to be coming here. I was disappointed until I saw the truth More time to practice not sounding like a goof.
I withdrew from my thoughts and looked around There was Ba and at Shank he frowned. Shank had no idea that he was spoiling Ba’s chance For Ba to man up and ask Alanna to this dance.
I laughed and let the night take me away The stress was gone until another day. And so I had a lot of fun Before I knew it, the night was done.
I woke up and it was saturday I felt good but the sky was grey This was a bad omen that I ignored I had slept so well! I never even yawned
I turn on the computer, I let it load I waited and waited until the windows logo showed. I decided to check email but I had totally forgot, That email of doom that I should have let rot.
I had new messages but none from Nicole But I didn’t worry. Today won’t be droll. So I let the morning go flying away, Before I knew it, it was the end of the day.
Once again I returned to my email To find a reply from a certain female. And there it was waiting for me; The reply of success, surely.
My heart was beating, I didn’t dare To read that which was written there. My hand hesitated for I could not bare, A reply that causes me to tear out my hair.
But then I decide to take the plunge This sweat making me as wet as a sponge. I opened the email that decided fate No more delay. I could not wait.
“I’m sorry, but I can’t go” This can not be! No no NO! “I’m sorry, but I can’t go…with you” No…After what I’ve been through…
The world had ended, Shank had won I had failed, the game was done. Silent tears flowed as I retreated to bed Sadness was swept up into dreams instead
I woke up feeling depressed the next day I couldn’t believe that it had happened this way. But I would not go down like this, I must stop Shank, make him miss.
I come to school, Shank says “Wassup!” “What a bummer that she didn’t turn up!” At recess I find Ba talking to Shank The subject, “Revenge” and some stuff about tanks.
Ba says that the Bible condones vengence “How ironic, that means I won’t pay repentance” “Only if the punishment fits the crime” “Perfect. You know, that sounds just fine”
So I vowed to stay close to Shank, never give him a chance To ask Nicole to the formal, they would never dance. To me it seemed an eye for an eye I couldn’t forsee how this plan died
And so it was Friday night once more. We were in a church with leaky walls. This time Nicole did indeed show What Shank was thinking we could only know.
An awkward triangle we three made In a river of emotion I did wade While Shank stood silent trying to think And eventually, Nicole ran off to get a drink.
Shank stayed away from her for most of the night I relaxed and watched some bogans fight. The next thing I know Shank has disappeared But before I could swear I saw what I feared.
Shank had a look of confidence on his face As he turned round the corner I was frozen in place But what came next was not expected Shank looked strangely affected
He rounded the corner looking resolved but as he came back the look had dissolved From within came an exclamation of glee: “She didn’t pick him and she didn’t pick me!”
To me it came as a great victory Shank tried to take it happily His poker face hid what emotion he felt He eyed me off till my face almost melt.
He was thinking the same as me “My ranga was stolen by Herlihy” I laughed and told him of my fail He seemed to be turning pale.
My thoughts turned inward, as they do And I got thinking about things undue This was not a victory at all, Oh boy did I just drop the ball
Revenge is a dish best served cold. That’s what I have always been told. So of course it came as no suprise When all of a sudden, I realised:
Nicole would not be at our formal With me or Shank or someone normal. I couldn’t help feeling that it was all my fault I should have locked my hard feelings in a vault
I was blind. Look what I’ve done. Oh sad consequences of my fun. As I dealt with reality It finally sunk into me
This formal is more trouble then it’s worth Time to get more down to earth. And so I chose to forget these incidents I did not want to remember, the memory was rinsed
And so I forgot, I could not recall Until another email brought me back to it all. Ba gives the facts as blunt as a plank “Nicole wanted to say yes to Shank.”
Ba haven’t you heard that ignorance is bliss? Why oh why did you have to tell me this? I demand that you now let me know From where this information flows
But Ba is silent, he does not say Why these tidings came my way So I leave the mystery unsolved And once again the memories dissolved
The formal it did come and go And I did not toss to and fro I just came and had some fun Before I knew it, the night was done.
On the bus I sat with Shank We talked of all things rank Hot chicks, porno, renticle tape But I didn’t stop it, It was too late.
Shank was not an enemy then “I still wish you asked Nicole again, Even though we had such fun, I still wish that she had come”
I hear a sigh, he gathers breath I’m so tired I feel like death “We’re still learners” is the last thing he said But I still wish that I had my redhead.
I haven’t seen Shank since then, And I have taken to the pen “We’re still learners” lingers in sight With that in mind I kiss the Formal good night
I finally can let it go No more of this horrible show Months have passed since I last cried. To the formal, a big “Good bye!”
But no, I had a dream last night You see, it gave me quite a fright Not because it was a nightmare But for what was contained in there:
The formal again, I’m back on the boat With Ba, Alanna and a red goat. But there is one I was not expecting to see Nicole! And she is coming towards me.
But before I can say “This must be a dream” There appears Shank, his smile like a beam. Hands clasped firmly with Nicoles, I was enraged at the sight Such a fury that I woke myself up in the middle of the night.
I do not know what this dream meant But one thing I know as hard as cement: This formal will not close it’s door It will plague my mind forever more.
Johnny is a Bishop, Heretic, Prophet, Priest, Apostle and ASM (Ascended Spiritual Master). On his good days he is often also the one true almighty God incarnate. He enjoys writing theology and philosophy articles and spreading the Gospel promise of Universal Salvation
Johnny is a Bishop, Heretic, Prophet, Priest, Apostle and ASM (Ascended Spiritual Master). On his good days he is often also the one true almighty God incarnate. He enjoys writing theology and philosophy articles and spreading the Gospel promise of Universal Salvation
The kiss, playful and testing at first, then committing to penetration with the tongue. At first I feel surprise, but then dive in and the kiss turned full body as we drew our bodies closer and closer together. We were melting into each other. I was losing my breath, she was losing hers. It was awesome. Her wetting her lips in expectation and tilting her chin back saying “I want this”.
The grope. It was great to play with her erect and electrified nipples and to delicately squeeze her wonderful breasts. It was brilliant to watch her smile and see her look of bliss, to hear her lose breath, hide under the covers, let out little moans, lose control, all just by my love, my fingers and her trust. As she guided my hand beneath her shirt and held it there. All too much. All too good.
Her eye contact, the avoidance of her eye contact. Every now and then she would look at my face, then close her eyes and smile and turn away with a look that said “How did I get here? How did this happen? why did he pick me? How did I end up with this great guy holding me? Who is he?”. The fact that I was so comfortable gazing at her and taking her in while she felt overwhelmed by it in such a positive way.
Her face, hair, nose, lips, cheeks, eyes, eyebrows, eyelashes. Her sleeping head resting on my chest.
The little, honest comments I would drop which made her feel special made me feel brilliant, like I was the man. “You’re beautiful” I would whisper, staring into her eyes, and her face would light up as she closed her eyes and turned away, looking as if she was melting under intense love from the manliest man on the planet. The feeling of making a girl feel so special is wild. “You’re lovely”, “So are you”. The fact that she was speechless. “You… There are no words that describe you…”. I felt like The Shit. My love is indescribable? Well thank you lord!
Her attachment. “Don’t leave without me”. Her tracking us back to the flat. “Come have tea with us”. “Come to breakfast with us”. Her stream of text messages! How did I manage to make such an impression on her? If it is the love of God, I can’t stand to see it perverted. By this point, there was all too much pride…
Playing with her hair and hands. Having her draw on me. The physical trust.
“It could have been anyone” “but you’re the one who stole my phone”
“fine… enjoy your stoopid walk” “Oh I will 😛 Until next time :)” “Next time?” “:)” “…” Silence
Johnny is a Bishop, Heretic, Prophet, Priest, Apostle and ASM (Ascended Spiritual Master). On his good days he is often also the one true almighty God incarnate. He enjoys writing theology and philosophy articles and spreading the Gospel promise of Universal Salvation
![6f78e67723857a7a3446ac9d99a3414c[1].jpg](https://antipodeanosmosis.files.wordpress.com/2019/03/6f78e67723857a7a3446ac9d99a3414c1.jpg?resize=676%2C381)
I step out the door into the frost
![space-960x460[1].jpg](https://antipodeanosmosis.files.wordpress.com/2019/03/space-960x4601.jpg?resize=676%2C324)
I sublimate all that I hear, smell and feel.![dark-dream-christiano-torres[1].jpg](https://antipodeanosmosis.files.wordpress.com/2019/03/dark-dream-christiano-torres1.jpg?resize=640%2C480)
![Clockwork-Orange-34[1].jpg](https://antipodeanosmosis.files.wordpress.com/2019/03/clockwork-orange-341.jpg?resize=676%2C282)
![wintermemorie-6592[1].jpg](https://antipodeanosmosis.files.wordpress.com/2019/03/wintermemorie-65921.jpg?resize=294%2C294)
We were standing there one winters day![seven-last-words-church-of-god-in-christ-jesus-vNBnzj-clipart[1]](https://antipodeanosmosis.files.wordpress.com/2019/03/seven-last-words-church-of-god-in-christ-jesus-vnbnzj-clipart1.jpg?w=1024&resize=676%2C449)
I opened up my heart to you![Normanhurst-Boys-High-School[1].jpg](https://antipodeanosmosis.files.wordpress.com/2019/03/normanhurst-boys-high-school1.jpg?resize=676%2C450)
We were Sitting down at lunch one day,![329a-90c1-4fd3-abcc-5c8b2a5bb2e6[1]](https://antipodeanosmosis.files.wordpress.com/2019/03/329a-90c1-4fd3-abcc-5c8b2a5bb2e61.jpg?resize=300%2C300)
I’ve experienced emotions![sexyforeplayblackandwhite[1].jpg](https://antipodeanosmosis.files.wordpress.com/2019/03/sexyforeplayblackandwhite1.jpg?resize=283%2C424)
The kiss, playful and testing at first, then committing to penetration with the tongue. At first I feel surprise, but then dive in and the kiss turned full body as we drew our bodies closer and closer together. We were melting into each other. I was losing my breath, she was losing hers. It was awesome. Her wetting her lips in expectation and tilting her chin back saying “I want this”.